Rodents!

I know that many benighted folk think that rodents are cute. I was once one of these, in fact, the proprietor of two sets of gerbils. However, rodents are scum. They will wreck your home, and send you to the loony bin. I have found that it is not enough to shoot the red squirrels with my pump-m-up air rifle, and SNAP flying squirrels inside the walls.  Although word seems to have gotten out amongst the island red squirrel population, we have for a long time coddled the chipmunks, and to what end? They have recently laid waste to the garden that Jonas and I planted, ingesting cilantro and parsley as though there was no tomorrow, and even putting the emergent squash to the knife of their sharp little teeth.
Where, oh where, is our friendly local barn owl? Who cooks for youuuuu?
I have not been successful in following advice from the web. One sage soul suggested putting seeds in a bucket of water, adding a gangplank, and letting the striped fellas plunge to their watery grave. Didn't work. The seeds sank, no one visited. Well, electronics to the rescue. Tomorrow the Rat Zapper goes to work. It has dropped an invader mouse in two minutes. Ciao, ciao chippies.